Changes

Recently, a girl who broke my heart from miles away had got in contact with me and started an exchange of messages on Facebook. In 7 hours from writing this blog, at 9 in the morning, I will be applying for a job that may grant me the opportunity to move into a place of my own and actually be almost self-sufficient. I am watching a good friend of mine nestle her way into a new relationship and I am watching my 13 year old Jack Russel Terrier slowly go blind in his one good eye.

Most, if not all of my life, I have been in the middle of a castrophoney of events. I won't bore you with everything that has happened.

But for some reason, as I grew older, I stopped thinking like everyone else. Not in the "I am a rebel against The Man" sense, but I began seeing things on a more macro scale, instead of keeping things in the micro-scale of my small town and the things around it. And when I went to college, my eyes opened up to a world that I had not even begun to imagen or understand. And I look back on myself, before I started changing into the world view I have to today.

And man, I want to be the shit out of my past self.

But besides wishing harm on the ignorant past of my own, it still boggles my mind how much I've changed.

While looking back on this, contemplating to myself, I can only smile to myself.

You know...in that sort of secretive way.
The way you do when you know your alone and
...and no one can see you vulnerable.

I smile because of paradox.

Just one paradox actually. Something that, for the past 8, maybe 10 years, has gotten me through an unstable psyche.

And that paradox is the fact that the only thing that is ever
constant and unchanging is the idea of change itself.

Change is the only universal constant.

Everything, person, whatever, always,
in some way,
whether big or small.
Changes

It may sound weird at first. But hell, I'm a weird person.

It may, at first, sound impossible.

you may know things that have never changed.

family traditions perhaps.

or maybe a love for a certain food.

But, if you were to really sit down and be honest with yourself
You could think of some aspect of anything that has changed.

Change neither is good nor evil. It does not choose sides. It does not pity nor does it favor.

Change just is.

It may sound silly to you, dear reader, but it is what gets me through.
This is the one thing I truly believe in.

But who knows, one day, that may change...