Corporations

Sorry it's been over a month since I've last written, I've been exhausted. With the new kitten, of which I will eventually post pictures of, work getting more complicated along with my yearning to get back into academia, I just haven't had the desire to write.

But when I was outside, I got to thinking. I recently watched Babylon A.D. Great movie with Vin Diesel. (I don't care what people say, that D&D nerd is a bad ass action star and a good actor.) There was this scene in the movie where they were flying in a jet liner. The hull was painted with in Coca Cola decor. Sounds innocent right?

Yet, for some reason, it got me to thinking.

Another movie I watched recently is called Idiocracy. Great movie featuring Luke Wilson. and alot of it says something about corporations if you look at it the way I did the second time I watched it. Pixar's movie Wall-E also has a lot to say about future corporate involvement in our everyday lives.

These movies, and more, are saying alot about how too much corporate involvement is a detriment to us as a society. But what is odd is all of these movies...are produced/funded/made by corporations themselves.

It is almost like we are being warned about something happening by the people who are making it happen, but it is in a movie, so we perceive it as make believe. the simple that corporations are able to joke about and make money off of using the concept of Total Societal Neocolonialism is astonishing to me.

It's like a friend coming up to you, laughing his/her ass off about how he/she is going to shoot you in the face in the near future with the shotgun they just purchased, then getting you to laugh about it as they pull the trigger.

Granted, there are some good corporations out there. I will try to refrain from lumping all corporations into one group and labeling them as evil. That's just stupid.

But the simple fact that we can laugh about something that could be a distinct reality in the near future scares me.

Side Note: My kitten is awesome and made of win.

a free spirit at 6:30 in the morning

I hate mornings and I'm not really sure why. Maybe it's because I realize that I am semi- or totally addicted to Advil PM to shut my brain off at night so I can get up for work in the morning. That I can't go until I drop, get up whenever my body is rested and do that again. Even now, while writing this out, I am still rubbing the sleep out of my eyes and wondering what the fuck I am doing writing at this ungodly hour of the morning.

But I would like to have a bit more faith in myself and not think that I hate mornings because I am lazy. In fact, I would like to believe I am quite industrious. I mean hell, I amwriting a blog at 6:30 in the morning. So let me turn on my new discovered Korean Pop music and try to get my thoughts out.

By the way, Lee Hyori is gorgeous. I'd recommend looking her up. I've been addicted to her song 'Anyclub' featuring Teddy.

I originally wanted to write this blog about how much we owe to farming in our society. not just for food, but in how we schedule things as well. For example, why does our business day start so "early"?. We originally had to get up this early to take care of the animals and the fields while there was light outside. Summer vacation for schools was also originally because the children needed to be able to help on the farm during the time with most day light.

Also, if you'd notice, most alarm clocks are annoying as fuck. Well, if you've ever heard a rooster crowing in morning, you'd see the connection. Those things are fucking annoying.

Anyway, I realized that as much as we owe to farming in shaping our society in the realm of self schedule is almost as much as I care. recognizably but still very little. I think the only reason I was going to write about farming is because I didn't want to be up this early and wanted to be sympathetic to people that HAVE to be up this early.

Which made me think, in a totally random direction, am I too free spirited for my own good? All I want to do is spend my days or nights going to concerts, networking between my diverse group of friends to hear and see stuff I normally wouldn't, writing down my insane story ideas to decode my own self, dive into the fantasy worlds of video games, be intimate with someone I care for and somehow make enough money to do this and take care of my finances.

I'm actually a fairly simple guy. I have a POS cell phone, a used car, an old computer. I don't have top of the line stuff. Though I do realize the irony of saying I am simple but have technology. So shut your face, it's early for me :)

but what I think I am trying to get at while my brain is still waking up is that maybe I need to learn to enjoy my mornings and still do the things I want to do and figure out how to get paid for it.

Or maybe I am too tired to make coherent thoughts for a blog.

I may write one later tonight just to put out some thing with a more intelligent design.

Doesn't help matters that I was distracted by this and this

Sorry...it's early.

Religion from an Agnostic

It's weird.

For some reason, Religion seems to be becoming a popular topic of discussion around me. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I am now comfortable telling people I am agnostic, when before, I really wasn't. But it seems now that some co-workers and neighbors know I am agnostic, from their asking, I keep hearing more about this 'God' fellow. As if I've become some sort of magnetic for potential redemption now that I am not part of the crowd.

Yet, I can find it within myself to believe. Maybe it's because I've been to other temples, shrines, etc, and have seen the faith that other religions can bring. Maybe it's because I simply don't believe there is anyway I can worship something that would be impossible to disprove or prove. I understand the leap of faith involved in religion, I just don't think its for me.

But, if I was to believe, I have a feeling I know where I might.

I was reading up on Hinduism and there was this interesting concept they have, besides Dhrama and Karma. They don't believe in hell because they believe they very concept of hell states that there are deeds that can be done that are outside of God's love. Very interesting concept.

But something that grabs my attention more so, is the concept of Omniquantism.

I read it in a webcomic. I know it sounds silly, but the base idea makes a lot of sense to me. The idea of Omniquantism is that all religions are correct.

How so? you may ask.

Well, if God, or whatever deity, is truly omnipotent, couldn't all the religions beliefs be true? couldn't each culture just have interpreted divine action differently than others?

I think if there is a God, Omniquantism makes the most sense. Every religion is correct, they are just different interpretations of the same actions.

If you look into the base religion of Japan. Not the major religions, but the overall, kind of neighborhood religion, there is this concept that is very close to religion. the Japanese people believe they are all children of the sun, and the sun has sent down it's son and they pray to him for help, guidance, and all that. that sounds very close to how Jesus came down from God, and we are all God's children.

Similiar ideas, just interpreted differently.

I've also heard rumors that, in those years of Jesus' life not documented in the bible, from age 12 to age 30ish, that Jesus may have spent some time studying in the Orient, practicing his teachings and learning along the way. This would tie into the idea of different interpretations.

What I find most silly is that many people who are devoutly religious have never taken the time to look at what other religions are saying and immediately assume they are wrong. I am not saying all devoutly religious people do that, but I would wager my money on 'many' being the correct vernacular.

But when you really look at it, Religion is pretty much the same. They all have their rituals and sense of community. Ways of reaffirming belief and all that good stuff Emile Durkheim talks about in his study of religion.

By the way, if you never have, I'd recommend reading Durkheim's work Ritual and Religion, can be quite interesting. Especially his talk about the sacred and the profane. After I'm done reading my book on consciousness, and the complete works of Max Weber, I'm going to dive back into Durkheim's work.

Anyway, that's all I can really think of to say about this, just thought this might be a bit thought provoking

Tired

Man, I hate being tired all the time. It's hard for my brain to work.

I'll post something sometime this weekend.

I got enough thoughts floating around in this tired brain to say something still.

In the face of change

It is just one of those days.

I sort of want to escape. But I won't.
I will go do something that will distract me, but it won't be until I start dreaming that I really face it. So maybe I am escaping to my dreams.

I don't know.

The day started off fine. A boss's birthday and there was free food, which was nice, since I am currently broke off my ass. But the day only got worse.

I just had a horrible performance at work. I got overwhelmed, frustrated and didn't do as well as I know I can. At lunch, I found out Robert Jordan, who is an amazing writer, died recently. After work, I found out that my friend Anne couldn't visit me because she got into trouble. And as soon as I get home, I find out an old family friend had finally fallen to her cancer and died Friday.

R.I.P. Jan Kannrey. 7/18/08.

So I went outside, to try and get my mind off of the day, when I saw a beetle, back on the ground and squirming desperately.

"Why is everything dying?" I said aloud to no one in particular.

I sighed.

"Not everything is dying." I corrected.

I stared at the beetle for a bit, watching as it squirmed around and contemplated what I should do. Normally, I think I would crush it, but I didn't have it in me today. I grabbed a small tool and flipped the beetle over onto it's feet. Only to find out that one of it's front legs was broken.

And all I could think to myself was "All I can do is put you back on your feet."

I'm not totally sure what the point of the blog was. Maybe it's just a shitty day. Maybe I am trying to find more meaning to connect a series of seemingly unrelated events.

Or maybe it's just a shitty day.

Quitters never prosper

I have this addiction.

And I want to quit.

And as i type this and look at that line, part of me is laughing and part of me is crying. I was outside on my patio, contemplating this to myself as i fell into this addiction, when I stepped on this small pin. It had it's back on, but part of the needle was peaking out of the shell.

Maybe it was supposed to get my attention.

I picked it up and all it said was "Real"

How are you supposed to stop participating in something you enjoy when you know it's bad for you. An abusive relationship with myself and I'm unable to walk away.

I need a shower, but I need to clean more than my skin.

My Neighbor

Life has been pretty hectic lately. Moving into a new place, trying to get it organized, adjusting to a new schedule, slowly morphing into a working stiff. I've been working at this place for less than two weeks and already I am trying to figure out how to get promoted. But even as my life tries to turn mundane, my brain has still been active.

Lately, I've had this idea for a short story involving a young girl, a dragon, the grim reaper, and a roof top as they contemplate life and the stars and such. The idea is slowly panning out. But I can't seem to take the time to sit down and write it.

I think one of the things that keeps me from being creative is my neighbor.

I don't mean to say that she is loud or disruptive in anyway. In fact, she leaves me alone. When I go out to the patio, if she is out there, is inquires about my life and I, to her's. But neither of us really have anything going on. I'm starting a job, she works. We both live alone, even though her boyfriend visits her often. I've been told they have an on and off relationship, and by my estimations, it's going through an On-phase.

But it begs the question, why do I wonder about her?

And today, while trying to walk around and get inspired to actually write something and not loose whatever touch I have with my authoring skills, i think i have figured out what bugs me.

I would like to consider myself a man of possibilities. Not just possibilities for myself, but what possibilities lie in store for others. I think one of the reasons I am such good friends with my friend Matt is that I see such possibility in him that part of me just wants to see how it will turn out. Like reading a good book that happens to be two thousand pages long. You don't want to rush it, but you are still anxious to see how it turns out.

But when it comes to possibilities and my neighbor, I've started to wonder what route she has taken in her life. The majority of the time I see her, she is slurring her words. Since it is not a constant thing, the easy assumption is that she is drunk. Most of the time, I do see her drink a lot. But someone such as myself is in no position to assume a moral soapbox. Nor should I be one to assume at all. My socially train gut instinct tells me she might be a drunk.

Yet another event sticks out in my mind. One night, while out on the patio, relaxing, I overheard a conversation she was having on her side of the porch. And the young man, maybe a few years older than I, was asking her if she wanted him to remove her other personality.

I think the hopeless romantic thinker in me wants to secretly delve into her past. What was she like when she was younger? When you first look at her, you might think of an old toy doll sewn up but still wrinkled from age but someone felt compelled to give her new, if not silvery hair. I wonder what she was like before I met her? Maybe as a youth, she was extremely intelligent bookwise, but made a few bad decisions. Maybe she has always been a bad seed. But I can tell she is not a bad person completely. Whenever I talk to her, I am oft reminded of how she raised her son from the age of 4 to 18. She is proud of him, that is for sure.

Though in a rare instance of timidity, I don't pry into her life. Maybe I am afraid of seeing my romanticized ideals of what she could, or can be, lashed to pieces. Maybe part of me is cautious of making a new attachment to someone when I know I won't be staying where I am for more than two years (I hope).

But I find my self somewhat disappointed to not see her when I go out back.

The only thing I know is that this contemplation is interfering with my other writing, and it's pissing me off.